Boring Old Raphael.TUMBLR

Anonymous asked: What happened to Tip Me Over, Pour Me Out? Will it ever come back?

Not really on-topic, but okay, I’ll answer.

Tip Me Over, Pour Me Out. was an autobiographical webcomic I wrote from 2006 to 2008, illustrated by the insanely talented Lisa Hanawalt. For a while after the series ended, the full archive remained online at TMOPMO.com, but now if you go there, all you’ll see is an error message.

What happened? Good question! Basically what happened is something happened to the publishing platform I was using but it had been so long since I last used it that I forgot the password to my account with the platform and also I forgot what the platform was and also I forgot the password to the FTP account and also I forgot how to access the FTP account so basically I forgot how to have and maintain a website.

But also I’m kind of glad not to have that stuff still floating around on the internet, because a lot of it is pretty personal and embarrassing. It was a period of my life (and my development as a writer) that I’m glad I went through and I’m glad I documented and I’m glad I shared, with those who were paying attention at the time, but I think it might just be one of those you-had-to-be-there things. I’m a big fan of the concept of ephemeral art, and I think TMOPMO might just be that.

So, to answer your question, no, TMOPMO is never coming back. Maybe you were lucky enough to buy a book when we were selling them (only six dollars!), but if not, well, we’ll always have our memories.

And if you want to know what the Future Me will one day consider too embarrassing and personal,

SEE OUR MOVIE, LOS ANGELES.
SEE OUR MOVIE, CHICAGO.
SEE OUR MOVIE, ANYWHERE.
ASK ME ABOUT THE EXQUISITE CORPSE PROJECT, OR OLDE ENGLISH. 

(Oh, P.S., if it’s any comfort to any TMOPMO fans out there, Lisa and I are currently collaborating on a brand new project that’s very exciting and very cool and I can’t wait to tell you all about it when the time is right.)

Anonymous asked: I'm excited to see you guys in Philly tomorrow! If you're there, will you give me a big hug please? I promise to not get a boner.

Your boner-free guarantee is very heartening, but I won’t be at the Philly screening. I know Ben and Julia will be there, and probably Chioke and a good chunk of the New York-based crew. I hope you like it!

Also, I’m pimping the LA and Chicago screenings today, because those are the shows I’ll be at, but we have all sorts of possible screenings popping up all over the country, from Boca Raton, FL to Redwood City, CA (my mom is hosting that one). The full list is here, and you can also request a screening in your own city.

ASK ME ABOUT THE EXQUISITE CORPSE PROJECT, OR OLDE ENGLISH.
SEE OUR MOVIE, LOS ANGELES.
SEE OUR MOVIE, CHICAGO.
SEE OUR MOVIE, ANYWHERE.

Anonymous asked: I saw the movie back when you guys screened it in Austin, and I loved it. Do you know yet when physical copies will be available so I can add it to my collection? And will it be blu-ray/DVD/both?

There will definitely be a DVD available at some point (which will include even more behind-the-scenes footage as a bonus feature, and possibly the option to just watch the movie without the documentary breaks, if anyone would actually want to see that). I don’t know about blu-ray, but I would guess yes, if there’s enough demand for it. We’ll also be selling other merch, like posters, “Museum Owner” t-shirts, and Wake Up Kings CDs (the t-shirts and posters are already available at our screenings, but at some point everything will be available online). As for the when of it, I don’t know yet, but you can be sure when it happens, I will be blogging about it here until you’re all sick of hearing about it.

ASK ME ABOUT THE EXQUISITE CORPSE PROJECT, OR OLDE ENGLISH.
SEE OUR MOVIE, LOS ANGELES.
SEE OUR MOVIE, CHICAGO.
SEE OUR MOVIE, ANYWHERE.

∞ Ask Me Questions About The Exquisite Corpse Project or Olde English

Hey! Did you know my comedy group made a movie? Did you know it’s called The Exquisite Corpse Project? Did you know it’s been available to stream and download for the last week? Did you know we have a screening in LA TONIGHT? Did you know we’ll have a screening in Chicago next week, IF we sell enough tickets in the next 24 hours?

Today I will be answering any questions in my askbox about the movie, or about Olde English in general.

Thank you to everyone who’s downloaded the film already or come out to our screenings. People have been saying some very nice things (in just the last week), like:

• “a hilarious, touching look at the trials and tribulations of friendship, creativity and collaboration. It’s funny on a ton of levels, from immediate to super-meta. But more than that, it perfectly and genuinely explores the process of working creatively with friends when you’re young and your intense passion is rivaled only by your relative inexperience.”
• “really something special. Besides being extremely funny and charming, it speaks volumes about the creative process, collaboration and friendship. The way the documentary aspect mirrors the narrative they wrote is fascinating. The film becomes much more than a silly project, but rather evolves into a statement about human nature and relationships. You definitely haven’t seen anything like it.”
• “I feel like The Exquisite Corpse Project taught me something about human nature. Ben’s goal with this project was to reunite old friends who had gone down separate paths in the hopes of rekindling the magic. Alas, it doesn’t quite work out how he expected: people change and so do their relationships. Thematically, it really resonated with me, and that’s not something you find in most comedic films.”
• “As an unexpected treat, this documentary approached some questions I’ve been marinading in for the past couple of years: What does it mean to be close to someone? How can one person stay close to another when the two personalities start to evolve into incompatible patterns, to the point of eventually canceling each other out? How do you sustain a relationship when its fundamental properties dictate that it cannot stay the same? I was pleasantly surprised to see the plot of the narrative, in its own peculiar ways, try to answer these questions over and over again. Also the movie’s funny.”
• “It’s super funny, but the way the patchwork, this-should-not-work movie at the heart of things rises above insanity and becomes a mirror for the writers’ own feelings on friendship and collaboration is really pretty special. See it!”
• “you guys need to see this movie right now.  if it’s coming to your town, you must go see it.  and if it isn’t, it’s well worth $5!!”

One of my favorite things about seeing the movie with a live audience is the Q&As that follow — when we get to hear back from the audience and answer whatever lingering questions they still have, and I today I want to try to have one of those, in blog form. If you’ve seen the movie and have any questions for me, Raphael, one of the writers, or if you haven’t seen the movie and have any questions, today’s the day to ask! Ask, ask, ask! Also, see the movie, see the movie, see the movie!

Lunch With The Person Who Dumped You

You get an email from your ex-whatever-it-was-you-two-were-exactly, asking to meet for lunch. The tone of the email is friendly, casual, if a bit stiff. You agree, in a friendly, casual, if a bit stiff email of your own, and a date is set. But what kind of lunch will it be? Hold your breath and SPIN! THAT! WHEEL!

The No Hard Feelings Lunch

This is probably the best case scenario. You can be friends again and put all this ugliness behind you.

“You and me, we’re okay, right?”

You’ll agree that whatever it was that you had was nice, for what it was, but the timing was bad, you wanted different things, you’re two different people after all; It Was Just One Of Those Things, as Ella Fitzgerald sang, but minus the part about it being a trip to the moon on gossamer wings.

You’ll offer each other weak declarations that there are no bad guys here (because there aren’t, not really) and halfhearted promises that you’re not reviled by each other’s friends, that there haven’t been long heated conversations about whether or not you suck. Most important, though, is the unspoken understanding that both of you are people, weak, wounded, fragile, forgivable people doing the very best you can under the impossible circumstance that is day-to-day existence.

In the great grand scheme of things, this is nothing, this wound — it’s a nick of a razor, a scrape of the knee — and if you say it enough times and with enough vehemence and smile wider each time you say it, you can even convince yourself. After all, what were you hoping for, really? What was this ever going to be, realistically? Isn’t this the best thing that could have possibly happened, for it to have ended now, before somebody really got hurt?

This is much better. This makes sense.

Everything’s fine, you can assure each other, and yourselves. Everything will always be fine.

The Airing Of Grievances Lunch

Are you prepared for this? Do you have a list, with bullets, ready to go?

Read More

∞ We did this interview for Splitsider where we talked about The Exquisite Corpse Project and Olde English,

so check it out if you are interested in those things. I like this interview a lot, even though I’m a little embarrassed by how much I talked (and how much I swear). Also, never before has the phrase “[They all laugh.]” been used so many times to imply, “You wouldn’t necessarily know it from the words they are saying, but these people actually like each other!”

The screenings in New York and Boston this week were a lot of fun. We have more screenings coming very soon: New York on Tuesday, LA ON WEDNESDAY!!!, and Philadelphia on Thursday, as well as many more soon to be announced.

Most importantly, YOU can now watch The Exquisite Corpse Project from the comfort of your own home, thanks to the good people at Splitsider Presents! Just five dollars to stream or download — what are you waiting for?!

It’s been  totally surreal reading people’s reactions to the film these last few days. After sitting on the movie for so long (besides a few festival screenings), I love finally getting to see what others take away from it, what their favorite parts are, what surprises them most. I mean, I knew that I thought the movie was good, but to get so much love and support from so many long-time friends and fans as well as complete strangers all at once?

Well, fuck my face.

Oh, hello there.

I feel like I’m going to be an awesome parent

because every time my kid asks me a question I don’t know how to answer, I’m just going to pretend the question was rhetorical.

“Dad, what does irony mean?”
“I know, right?”

“Dad, what does the president do?”
“Ha! Exactly.”

“Dad, are you drunk?”
“Man, you’re telling me. Society, right? Am I right? … Society.”

“

ACCORDING TO ARISTOPHANES, there were originally three sexes: the Children of the Moon (who were half male and half female), the Children of the Sun (who were fully male), and the Children of the Earth (who were fully female). Everyone had four legs, four arms, and two heads and spent their days in blissful contentment.

Zeus became jealous of the humans’ joy, so he decided to split them all in two. Aristophanes called this punishment the Origin of Love. Because ever since, the Children of the Earth, Moon, and Sun have been searching the globe in a desperate bid to find their other halves.

Aristophanes’s story, though, is incomplete. Because there was also a fourth sex: the Children of the Dirt. Unlike the other three sexes, the Children of the Dirt consisted of just one half. Some were male and some were female and each had just two arms, two legs, and one head.

The Children of the Dirt found the Children of the Earth, Moon, and Sun to be completely insufferable. Whenever they saw a two-headed creature walking by, talking to itself in baby-talk voices, it made them want to vomit. They hated going to parties and when there was no way to get out of one they sat in the corner, too bitter and depressed to talk to anybody. The Children of the Dirt were so miserable that they invented wine and art to dull their pain. It helped a little, but not really. When Zeus went on his rampage, he decided to leave the Children of the Dirt alone. ‘They’re already fucked,’ he explained.

— Simon Rich, already fucked